My job as an acupuncturist is to rebalance your energy so that all your organs function as they should and you feel in harmony on all levels.  It’s a bit like Humpty Dumpty.  You fall over and I’m supposed to put you back together again!

But what if you are running on empty and have hardly any energy left for me to play with?  It happens more than you might think because, for many people, life is just one stressful situation after another.  Does this resonate with you?  Do you feel as if you are a hamster on a wheel which never seems to stop, and you get more and more physically and mentally exhausted?

There is a lot of advice “out there” about this, but I’m going to suggest something completely different which worked incredibly well for me.  It is very simple, requires no time and, when practised regularly, will result in a big part of that huge weight on your shoulders falling off, so that life can become easier to live.

It has to do with your interaction with other people.

If you look around you, you will see that many people spend much of their time explaining and defending their point of view.  And if you’re anything like me, you carry these arguments on in your head, even when the person concerned isn’t there anymore!  You continue to wind yourself up, feeling outrage, anger, upset, a sense of injustice … and create all sorts of symptoms such as stomach pains, insomnia, headaches and exhaustion … and for what?  Why is it so important that another person agrees with you or thinks about something the way you do?

Putting our energy into fighting another person in this way often gets us nowhere and, if we were to relinquish the need to defend our point of view, we would gain access to huge amounts of energy that had previously been needed for this futile exercise.  When we no longer feel the need to explain or defend, arguments are avoided, we remain in the present moment and create a space where a sense of peace can descend.

How does that sound?  I’m not saying it’s easy but I found the best way to keep putting myself back on this path, when I found myself going back to my old habits, was to say the following:

Today I am letting go of my need to defend my point of view and I don’t need to convince or persuade anyone that my point of view is the right one.  I am open to all points of view and require no specific outcome.

So, if this takes care of our interactions with others about our opinions, the second half of the equation is about how we respond to theirs.

We always think we know best what is good for others, right?!  And it becomes really important for us to let them know what we think, because we need them to acknowledge us and be grateful for our input … and we also have a fundamental need to be right, right?

The problem is that they usually aren’t interested in our input because they need to be right too, and they’re certain that they know better than we do what is best for them anyway.  So, as soon as we start giving well-meaning feedback, more often than not it is received as some form of criticism.  The shutters then come down and the atmosphere becomes antagonistic.

We all know that people aren’t going to change their minds or themselves unless they want to, and so imposing our views on people is another total waste of time and energy, and yet we still do it.  So, my suggestion is … stop! 

The solution is to have no attachment to another person’s behaviour or opinions.  It just causes problems … for you.

If you want to give it a try, here is the affirmation I used to help me:

Today I am committed to being detached.  I am stepping back and allowing people to be exactly as they are.  I am letting go of my rigid ideas about how people and things should be and participate in everything with detached involvement.

If you have been behaving like a strong, solid, rigid oak tree, try allowing yourself to soften and become flexible, swaying in the breeze like the willow.

By adopting the above suggestions, I hope that you will feel lighter and able to breathe in deeper.  Being right isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.  Just allow yourself to be happy and your body will thank you for it!

Let’s get you back to living life feeling well.

This article forms part of the series (At My) Wit’s End Wisdom